I’ve spent the entire day, holed up in a hotel room, drinking dangerous (physically and mentally) amounts of coffee and gorging on mini-bar Pringles. I’m writing, you see. The bonus chapter for The Book, plus something new and exciting that I can’t talk about.

Music up to 11, Do Not Disturb sign on the door. Just getting on with it. No distractions.

Well.

I say no distractions.

One distraction. An hour or so ago, Sarah Bee and I ended up talking on IM about product placement in films. Next thing we knew, we’d regressed back to the old Friday Thing days and we’re batting back and forth dumb pun titles for films with over-zealous product placement.

Here, fresh off the IM transcript, and in lieu of a proper blog post, is the list. I haven’t edited it for content or even spelling, so there are some terrible ones in the list for which I – we – apologise.

Feel free to Twitter me with your own suggestions.

Marmite Of The Living Dead
Coke floats
Eternal Sunpat of the Spotless Mind
Stannah And Her Sisters
Facebook/Off
Educating Ryvita
Little Miss Sunny Delight
Flash Gordon
Blackberry Pearl Harbour
Special K-Pax
Summer of Spam
Flora! Flora! Flora!
The Stellaphant Man
The Purple Loan Ranger
Blue Triple Velvet
The Long TGI Friday’s
The Smash of the Titans
Philadelphia
cIf…
A Chocolate Orange
Colgates of Heaven
Hitchikers Guide to… Galaxy
You, Me and Dairylea
Last.fm of the Mohicans
Hoovertigo
A Time To Dyson
PsyCoco Pops
North by Best Western
I (heart) Applebees
Ten Things I Hate About Youtube
Early Learning Centre The Dragon
Specsaving Private Ryan
The Blossom Hills Have Eyes
Kinky Boots
WH Smiths Goes To Washington
The Texas Homestore Chainsaw Massacre
School of Northern Rock
Mars Attacks!
Abby National Velvet
The Man Who Shot Libertys Valance
Dial M for Microsoft
The Birds Custard
M&Mento
The MaTwix
V for Viennetta
Léon
AA Confidential
The Malteaser Falcon
Cornetto’s Way
Cool Hand Loot
Craig’s List
The Big Lego-wski
Desperately Seeking Savlon
Rosemary’s Baby Gap
Tarxanax
Pringle White Female
A Few Good Mentos
Tic Tacxi Driver
Indiana Jones and the Last Lucozade
The Last Burger King of Scotland
B.T.
R Whites and the Seven Dwarfs
S*M*A*S*H
Guess Who? ’s Coming to Dinner
Monolpolyce Academy
Mutiny on the Bounty
Vera Flake
Who’s Afraid Of Golden Virginia Woolf?
Do The Right Guard Thing
Sophie’s First Choice

Right! Enough of this. More coffee, more words…